Here there be blue bashing, primal parenting, mushy moments. And Jared does not rap.

Here there be font failures, salsa failures, and sandwich failures. And Jared absolutely loses his mind.

Here there be sandwich abominations, drill-based spectral activity, and a lack of respect for fruit harmony. And Jared raps.

"I'm an introvert so I shouldn't host, right?"

Here there be raging ravers, professions of cast iron love, and a misguided agist tirade. And Jared lies.

Here there be pizza redemption, improvised cooling, and beverage betrayal. And Jared gets back to his roots.

Here there be hidden clothing caches, dope techno magic tricks, and fruit foraging at a moments' notice. And Jared raps.

Here there be a budget dinner challenge, an unorthodox breath mint, and a weirdo brick of delight. And Jared slow-jams.

Here there be BBQ sauces to spice up your 4th of July, wheat bread vs. white bread, and what to do about Rico. And Jared raps.

Welcome to Company Men. We're ding-dongs, and even we can have people over. Here there be kitchen failures, Chuck's strong pastry opinion, and Jared raps.